It Begins With a Thought

Yesterday was rough. My mother and I transported her mother from a care facility in Federal Way to her senior living home in Vancouver, WA. This is approximately a 4-hour excursion. A long time to be in a car with my grandmother.

This may sound harsh, but my grandmother is a difficult person to be around. Between her constant complaining, her biting judgments about everyone around her, and her persistent need for validation as a person, it can take a lot out of you just to sit next to her. This isn't new, its how she has always been, except now that she is in her 80's, every part of this is magnified.

Sure, she has a lot to complain about. And because I am NOT her, I cannot judge, and say that if I were in her shoes, I would feel differently. But because she is so caught up in her misery, all things beautiful pass her by, as if she were a stone wall. Nothing can penetrate, all things just slide away. Her mindset has her mired in a pit of lonesome sorrow. I wish with all my heart I could help her, but how can you change someone else's mind? Impossible.

Spending time with my grandmother yesterday helped me remember that quality of life is directly related to quality of thought. We have the choice to share love, to find beauty and bask in the peace we find, or we can choose to hoard our emotions, spread ill-feelings and revel in the sorrow we find.

"Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny." - Upanishads

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